Going outside the lines

A recent group of thoughts made me realize that I haven’t looked at myself in a mirror for many months. The last time I did, I had no real recognition of who that was looking back. The longing to find any semblance of myself has made me even more open to taking risks. 

I did a thing. I cried.

To feel actual tears flowing down my cheeks

A true release

Pink Floyd to ELO to Prince

I sang.

so loud I scared my cats

and then fell off my couch in laughter

I fucking danced, not well, but

I fucking danced! 

A whole gamut of emotions came and went

Every single one savored and fully experienced.

I went in search of answers but

Instead found feelings

Unexpected.

Magic.

Wonderfullyintensivelyoverwhelmimglyexcitingmassivelyunendingdeliciously 

challengingultimateemotionalconnectionawarenessfullspectrumexperience!!!

Holy fuck. 

Yesterday I did a thing. It’s been decades. For a few precious hours I actually felt something- my heart and brain and body and mind were reunited. To experience that comfort and contentment when it’s been absent for so long is not a single word I have in my vocabulary, thus my ode to Mary Poppins Super-cali-fragil-istic-expi-ali-docious! above.

The only thing absent at the end of the day was a hug.

2-27-22

 

You can be the side effect

I’d rather be the dope

-Prince-