March Madness

March Madness 

I’ve felt quiet and have been doing a lot of reflection. For me it feels like the calm after the storm, a calm I’ll gladly embrace while it’s here as that is so often elusive while feeling unsafe. There are still waves that rise and overwhelm but I’m better at riding it out now to find and arrive back to a place where I can still breathe color.

I’m fond of March Madness. It’s a title that’s been given to the NCAA basketball tournament that begins here in the US next week. Today is selection Sunday where all the teams are picked and seeded and bracketed. The higher seeds usually have a better chance but there’s always a “Cinderella” team, an underdog lower seed that plays well and advances deep. For the college basketball players this is their Super Bowl World Series, their chance to become national champions and to showcase their talent. 

For me, sports is a nice distraction. A place I can go for a couple hours and just enjoy the game, the athletes, the competition. I do have a few favorite teams in various sports but I most often just hope for a good game. March Madness tournament rarely disappoints for good games and I assume this year will be no different.

I will utilize my viewing to help tame my own madness, to continue to help myself recover and restore some light back into my life where it has been so dark these past few months. Does it hurt less, no. I've just accepted the added burden, the additional pain, continuing to discover and understand all that has been affected. 

I am trying. Trying to look at this as a new beginning. How could it not be as I’m at a new place, with newly added painful and open wounds to figure out and tend to. Starting over. It’s not exactly what I had in mind but there’s no denying it’s where I am at. 

Begin again. Let’s hope I have the strength. Just finding hope is a start. I’d much rather have solutions over awareness but they are usually a package deal. 

Double I isolated and invisible, me, myself, and I 

3.16.25

"They say beauty comes from a

spirit that has weathered many

hardships in life and somehow

continues with resilience.

Grace can be found in a soul 

who ages softly, even amid 

the tempest.

I think the loveliest by far is the one 

whose gentle heart bears a hundred scars 

from caring, yet still finds a way to pick up 

the lamp, one more time, to light the way 

for love."

 Susan Frybort