Memorial Day

Memorial Day

 It’s Memorial Day here, a day to celebrate those who have given their lives to keep our country free. For everyone who has had this extended weekend I hope you have enjoyed it. I haven’t felt too festive and it seems like others haven’t either. Those very things we fought for are being taken from us every day. My country and my heart both broken in unexpected ways.

I’ve spent every evening this past week sitting outside enjoying the beautiful weather and the sights and sounds that go on in my yard. While of course I enjoy watching and listening to the birds and the cats as I wait for the pool to be ready, it’s been incredibly silent this weekend.

I live in an old middle class neighborhood with a variety of people. Most summer weekends I hear people out enjoy theirselves with family and friends. This weekend, crickets. Silence. No kids, no music, no singing karaoke, no drinking, and no smells of BBQ feasts with fun and laughter. Just the quietness of what’s happening to our country.

It makes me very sad that we now seem to be living in a world of fear, where people stay silent because they’re afraid of being different. This country, the United States of America, who once bragged of and welcomed diversity, has now become openly filled with hypocrites, bigots, racists. Heartbreaking to watch people being persecuted just for existing. Our constitution being violated and threatened daily. 

Seeing all the destruction and cruelty happening to my country certainly doesn’t help as I deal with all my internal battles. It’s hard to find those glimmers, those moments of hope, the places to go to gain life force, some sustenance to continue. But thankfully I continue on, continue on my search to find enough light to stay. It challenges me like no other, this battle for life. 

I struggle on. Not sure what to expect. Not sure what I’m looking for. The only sure thing is it suck’s where I’m at.